Three guys are walking their dogs and get to chatting while they do their business. As things wrap up, the first man says “hey, watch this.” He drops three treats on the ground, and his dog walks up, studies them, then barks – “woof, woof, woof.”

“See that? I’m a mathematician, I taught my dog how to count.”

“That’s nothing,” says the second man. He drops a small pile of treats, his dog walks up and begins nosing and pawing around, and then steps back, having made a perfectly stacked pyramid. “I’m an engineer, I taught my dog construction.”

“Guys, that’s nothing. I’m a bartender, watch this.” The third man drops two milk bones on the ground and steps back.

His dog crushes both treats, snorts them, fucks the other two dogs and then calls out of work sick the next day.