Sekss.lv

Tag: open relationship

  • Relationship Crisis And a Spicy Way Out of It: It’s Not a Sin, It’s a Pleasure

    Relationship Crisis And a Spicy Way Out of It: It’s Not a Sin, It’s a Pleasure

    “I read an article about a conversation between a woman and a man about the so-called “open relationship” (you can read the article here). I can only say that I think this approach is very naive. I will share my and my husband’s experience – what we did when we had a relationship crisis.

    My husband and I have been together for many years. Of course, at the very beginning of our marriage, we didn’t need other people. We’ve been friends since school and are each other’s first and (hopefully) last love.

    We started nurturing our relationship from an early age. We got married young, we were only 18 years old. Children appeared early, when we were not even in our 20s.

    Now we are around 40. We are still young, the children are not small anymore and they don’t need so much care and attention anymore. You can say that we finally have time for a relationship. We have a house, the studies are finished, we have nice jobs – there is all the basis for us to simply enjoy life.

    ***

    But a couple of years ago we had a relationship crisis. We started to argue a lot, we were finished by the normal routine. Everything had already been tried in bed, so it seemed that there was no taste in life anymore. Everything got boring.

    We love each other, we are best friends, family. But sex no longer brought as much joy as in a new relationship. It happened that we both started looking at others. Here a beautiful woman winked at him, there a nice man smiled at me. It brings a lot of joy to life. And after returning home – the same routine again.

    So my husband and I sat down and decided that we will not destroy our family because of some “butterflies”. That what we have created is sacred and untouchable. We admitted to each other that sex had become boring.

    We agreed that we put each other first and it would be interesting to see how it would be with others. So we decided on an open relationship. We have rules that we follow. That it can’t be one long term partner, and that family is always a priority.

    Also, we don’t get too involved in each other’s details and we don’t tell each other in detail what we did and with whom. We also do not lie to other people, we are saying that we are married and do not want any serious relationship. We have relationships with each other, and with others there is only sex, pleasure.

    ***

    The first time I found out that my husband slept with someone else was painful. But come to think of it, who am I to judge him? I love him and it is important to me that he is happy. He has the same opinion.

    He admitted that for the first time he also had the idea of ​​punching the man who touched his wife. But we have come to the conclusion that jealousy only destroys relationships and trust. And we trust each other.

    When we are with others and have simply enjoyed the adventure, we come back to each other. The relationship has only become stronger. We are still friends, lovers, but we do not limit ourselves if we want to have sex with other people we like.

    What matters most is what is in the heart, and in the heart is love. Everything else is just physical satisfaction. If this relationship model satisfies both, then I see nothing wrong with it. It just adds to everyday life.”

  • Wife Who Gave Hints About Open Relationship: “Hearing His Answer Only Made Things Worse…”

    Wife Who Gave Hints About Open Relationship: “Hearing His Answer Only Made Things Worse…”

    “I had a strange conversation with my husband. We went for a walk. Earlier that day, I had read about what does or does not count as cheating. I read it out loud to my husband and we started discussing it. During the discussion we came to the question of relationships with others. I asked my husband if he could ever live in an open relationship. Something like this – we are family and that’s the most important thing, but there can be sex with others, if there is a lot of desire or affection.

    What answer did I expect from him? “No, I would never want another one, and I wouldn’t give you to anyone,” is how I imagined the answer. But the answer was nothing like that.

    In fact, his approach was much more liberal.

    “Why not… Of course, I don’t see the need for an open relationship right now, but in the future, if we want to, why not? However, the main thing is that we love each other, and sex is just a matter of pleasure. I don’t know, if you are raising small children, then of course you have to live traditionally, but if you don’t have children or they have grown up, you can live in any way.” This was his answer.

    I immediately lost trust in him. Of course, I asked him many questions after that. How could he live knowing I was with someone else? Would he like to be with another woman? Speaking and seeing his calm expression, hearing his answers only made it worse. I really wouldn’t want that. I didn’t answer him because I didn’t want to start crying. But this approach is really unacceptable to me.

    I understand that no one gets divorced because of things like “I MIGHT want to”. But it hurt me completely to know that my husband would gladly have sex with other people and let me do it. I feel how this awareness changes the whole attitude towards him and makes me think about the future separately. Maybe there are couples who live like this? It would be unbearable for me. “

  • Does monogamy guarantee happy relationship?

    Does monogamy guarantee happy relationship?

    Monogamy is a commonly known term that, unlike polygamy, refers to sexual and emotional attachment to only one partner. For modern people, a monogamous relationship is more binding than a polygamous one – it is a tradition made up of several aspects: the legal system, religion, and so on. But what is a successful monogamous relationship and how to achieve it? What is the role of sex and eroticism in such relationships? What if a couple wants to diversify their experience and one partner is not enough?

    How is monogamy different from polygamy and open relationships?

    The word “polygamy” translated from the Greek means “multi-marriage” – a close relationship with more than one partner. Meanwhile, monogamy determines the relationship with only one partner. Monogamy is prevalent in developed countries. Polygamy, on the other hand, shouldn’t be confused with the term ‘open relationship‘.

    Erotic fantasies and monogamy – are they compatible?

    It’s no secret that many of us have a lot of different erotic fantasies in our minds, and that’s perfectly normal. True, there are times when we unconsciously start fantasizing about sex with other partners, so the question naturally arises, is such fantasies not considered a violation of a monogamous relationship?

    Fantasizing about having sex with other partners is a fairly popular phenomenon and cannot really be considered a cheating.

    When it comes to monogamous relationships, it is worth remembering that erotic fantasies are a very personal thing, and everyone has the right to their own privacy, as long as the other one is not hurt. However, partners need to talk to each other and share their sexual fantasies, which can not only bring them closer, but also inspire passion in the relationship.

    Vai monogāmas attiecības garantē laimīgu kopdzīvi? Sekss.lv

    Does monogamy ensure a successful relationship?

    Everyone wants to know the recipe for a successful relationship, but it’s not that simple. A happy marriage and partnership depends on many aspects.

    If the partners feel safe, open to each other, if they try not to “fall” into the routine, are interested in each other’s emotional well-being, if they solve difficulties and are clearly aware that “long and happy relationship” requires both partners, the relationship tends to be long.

    On the other hand, a polygamy or open relationship is the choice of partners and will work as long as both of them are into it for 100%. Such couples are not characterized by outbursts of jealousy, misappropriation of a partner, and both partners also feel secure in such a commitment.

    However, neither monogamy nor polygamy alone ensures a 100% successful relationship – communication, openness, security, novelty and listening to each other’s needs are important.

    Vai monogāmas attiecības garantē laimīgu kopdzīvi? Sekss.lv

    What if you want to try a polygamous relationship?

    One must first be open to oneself. You should first understand your desires: maybe what you want is something new, an adventure, an experience. Or maybe you are running away from some kind of problem in the relationship or in yourself.

    Is cheating in a monogamous relationship the end of it?

    We often hear people say that they would never forgive distrust – and it is everyone’s choice. However, in a monogamous relationship, cheating often does not arise “out of nowhere,” so you should always be clear about your relationship. You need to improve it, analyze it, and talk about it with your partner.

    Before deciding to take a side step, the couple often don’t see and more often don’t want to see signs that something is wrong. A successful relationship also depends on the sexual life the couple lives.

    At other times, it seems that if you are already in a relationship, it will continue “forever and happily,” but resentments, outbursts of anger, lack of interest in each other, and suppressed passion can lead to cheating.

    However, if this has already happened, you should not go into the details of what happened, but focus more on the question “why did it happen to us?” If this question is difficult to answer, seek the help of professionals who can help you rediscover each other, get rid of resentment, and build an even stronger relationship.

    Mistrust can lead to the end of a relationship or, on the contrary, to the beginning of a new, stronger, closer relationship.

    Sex in a monogamous relationship: what can be done to make intimate life even more enjoyable?

    We have already mentioned that the main components of a successful relationship are a sense of security and novelty (risk taking, passion). But what can be done so that routine does not steal into the relationship and intimate life delights even couples who have been together for many years?

    On the one hand, we all need security in our relationship, but on the other hand, we want secrecy, risk, something unusual and new. In order for passion not to fade, it must be maintained at all times.

    Invite your loved one on a date! Longing, anticipation and desire are also important aspects that are constantly needed in a relationship so that passion and eroticism do not disappear. Don’t forget the playfulness as it delights and surprises.

    Poligāmija. Poligāmas attiecības. Sekss.lv

    What should I know before starting a polygamous relationship?

    First, talk to each other! An open conversation is the key here, because there is no “one-size-fits-all” answer. Openness is a prerequisite for conversation.

    If you want a monogamy, a long-term polygamous or open relationship may not work. On the contrary, there will be more and more resentment and jealousy, and this will certainly not lead to a stronger relationship, but rather to a breakup.

    However, if a couple chooses to be in an open relationship, it is necessary to discuss the boundaries. Understand what works for both partners and what doesn’t. Do your best to make both of you feel confident in your choices.