Finding the right partner can be a big challenge – dating, painful breakups and frustration. How do you know which of all the people you meet you would have a happy life with? And what if I told you that there is a love formula that helps you meet your one and only?
Let’s say the dating rules are simple: once you’ve decided to build a long-term relationship, you won’t be able to look into the future to find out which person is right for you, but at the same time, if you reject someone, there’s a little chance that you will get him/her back if you change your mind later. Mathematics, more precisely, the optimal stopping theory, can be used here. And it’s surprisingly simple:
While you’re young, take the time to explore the “market” without thinking of potential partners as long-term relationships. After this step, choose the next person who is better than everyone you met before.
But the optimal stopping theory goes even further. It turns out that the ability to stop and build a long-term relationship (P) is related to how many of your potential lovers (n) you reject (r) using a rather elegant formula:
This formula, according to mathematicians, can tell exactly how many people need to be rejected in order to find the one that suits them best. If you decided to meet ten potential partners in your life, then rejecting the first four has the highest chance of finding your long-term partner. And if it is decided to meet twenty candidates in your life, you will have to reject the first eight and only then will you find what will suit you for the rest of your life.
The magic number “37”
Let’s say you start dating when you are 15 years old, and ideally you would like to be in a permanent relationship until you are 40 years old. Using this formula, we can conclude that by the age of 24 you will have to reject all the partners you meet, or 37 percent of all life partners. When the rejection phase is over, choose the next person who is better than everyone you met before. Following this strategy will give you the best chance of finding the right one.
Unfortunately, mathematics will never be able to solve various problems we have to face in our lifetime – there is always the possibility that our true love will simply slip through our fingers. This theory can only suggest the path with the highest probability of success.
While this formula does not guarantee that you will be able to find lasting love, it is still a good strategy for deciding on the best choice in any large and uncertain area.
“For example, have you been given three months to find a new place to live? In the first month, reject all offers and then choose the next one that you think is best. Need to hire an assistant? Reject the first 37 percent of the candidates and then give the job to the next one who seems the best,” suggests Hannah Fry, a mathematician and discoverer of the love formula.