I read an article about sex and was very surprised: only 30 percent of British women, according to statistics provided by scientists in this country, are able to experience orgasm during sex. 2000 women took part in the survey, which means that 1.4 thousand of them do not experience these unforgettable feelings. Why is this so and what to do? I will share my experience, how I learned to orgasm.
My first orgasm did not come hand in hand with my first sex partner. I lost my virginity at the age of 19. Although I was expecting fireworks and applause, to be honest, I was disappointed. I felt nothing, neither pleasure nor pain. After that, the search for emotions and impressions began. Kisses and caresses were of course exciting, but the sex itself was uninteresting. I can’t imagine why people lose their minds over this process. As time passed, I couldn’t even imagine what an orgasm was like.
Life went on. One man replaced another, but the sensations of sex were the same. At one point I started digging through women’s forums. It turns out that I was not the only one who wanted to know what an orgasm was – there were hundreds of such women on the Internet.
The most popular advice is to change the man. There were rumors that there were these “masters of lower ends” who could please anyone. As a bonus, I came across statistics that a woman can experience an orgasm only 1.5-2 years after the beginning of sexual intercourse.
I followed the advice – I changed the man. While looking for that master, I changed several. There was no love – just a light intrigue. There was something memorable with each partner. During this period, sex brought me pleasure, but I still did not “know” orgasm. I dreamed that when this happened, I would be the happiest person in the world and my life would change beyond recognition.
Then I fell in love. He was 10 years older than me. There was a lot of sex. All it took was one inhale of his scent for me to be ready to do anything. We tried many things: both anal sex and crazy sex on the train. And he understood very well that there was no way I could ‘finish’, but what was unique about this man was that he, like me, really wanted me to finally reach the finish line. I realized that there are men in the world who are ready to even sacrifice their pleasure just to please a woman. Literally everything was “high level” except for the finale. We broke up even though we loved each other.
Each of us lived our lives in search of new sensations. We had not seen each other for a year until we met by chance. And again his smell, his caresses. The sex was indescribable. Later that night I woke up to him kissing my body. And then it just happened. I experienced an orgasm for the first time. Oral sex orgasm. What was it like? I felt happy, but a little strange – somehow I had expected to uncork a triumphant champagne, but I was incredibly calm. I just laid there, dreamily staring at the ceiling and smiling.
I will be forever grateful to this man. After that, orgasms came regularly. True, at first it required some effort. But that’s just my experience – how I learned to have an orgasm. Or rather, what had to happen for it to come to me. Here are two tips that have helped me:
- It definitely takes time. This fact must be accepted and the partner must also understand it. It is impossible to learn to orgasm during quick sex. Foreplay is a must! We just spent a lot of time together, talked, he huged me, we kissed a lot. For a woman, conversations are very important.
- You have to know your body. Listen to it. In which position do you feel maximum satisfaction. Don’t focus on the fact that you can’t reach orgasm – just enjoy the touches.