Intimate life inevitably experiences both ups and downs, as well as complete stagnation. How to find a way out? Let’s break down the mistakes that women often make and tell you how to correct them and what to do to make the sex in your relationship better and more exciting.
Mistake No. 1 – He is always the one who initiates
Why don’t women show initiative? This is one of the biggest mistakes a woman can make. It is believed that such behavior may seem too energetic or aggressive, so fear stops the desire to take the reins in their own hands.
Meanwhile, most men feel as if they are always the initiator, which upsets the balance of the relationship. Men want their partners to tempt them as much as they do. Being stuck in outdated ideas about sex roles also inhibits our satisfaction with sexual relationships.
Maybe sometimes you can show initiative too. It is very likely that your partner will appreciate your efforts and you will experience a new level of satisfaction.
Mistake No. 2 – You worry too much about your appearance
Thinking about how you look during sex prevents you from enjoying the process and reduces your ability to experience orgasm. In order not to think about it, focus on feelings, pleasure. Men want women to feel liberated during sex, which is hard to do when they are only concerned with flaws.
Believe me, he won’t notice half of your flaws even if he wants to. Men are attracted to free, open, enthusiastic, energetic and interested women. Try to be like that during sex, and he won’t notice your waist, which could be a few centimeters narrower, or your thighs and buttocks, which could have less cellulite.
Mistake No. 3 — The belief that men only want sex without relationship
We need to get rid of outdated beliefs that women are not sexual beings or that sex is only for a man’s pleasure. Sex is important to men – there is no doubt about it. But a study reveals that couples in long-term relationships derive much more satisfaction from sex than from casual relationships.
In addition, people who are married have sex more often and with better quality. It reveals a lot about the disadvantages of casual sex.
Mistake No. 4 – The belief that men are always ready for sex
Many things can affect a man’s libido, from family life to work, money or fatigue. This often surprises many women, and they begin to take men’s lack of interest in sex very personally. Remember, 99% of the time it has nothing to do with your partner not loving you anymore.
Mistake No. 5 – You don’t tell him what you like in bed
In other words, you’re not talking to him openly and directly about sex, what you like about it, what you’d like him to do, and what you’d like to try. Of course, putting your fantasies and desires into words can make you feel uncomfortable, even if you and your partner are very close. However, this is the only way to achieve a satisfying intimate relationship.
Every woman must take responsibility for her sexual experience – no man can bring her to orgasm if she is silent like a partisan.
Even the most skilled lover can’t know what you need unless you tell them.
Mistake No. 6 – You feel annoyed when he offers to try something new
You have been together for a long time and want to diversify your sex life, but when he offers something new, you are annoyed by these ideas? If your husband offers to try something new, remember that this does not mean that he is not happy with you or that he is not happy with sex. In short, don’t take it so personally.
It is true that it is important to stay in your comfort zone. No one should feel obliged to do what they do not want in the personal and intimate sphere. If your partner wants to try something that’s outside of your morals, make it clear that it’s not for you and explain why. Of course, speak with love and as gently as possible.
If it is not related to moral standards, but still not acceptable, be sure to explain why you feel that way. If the offer is sudden and catches you off guard, try not to react too stormy. You can say that you need time to think.
Are you tired of the routine and want to keep your passion in relationships, supplementing them with exciting sex adventures? If you are not afraid to take risks and want to satisfy your man like never before, then these secrets of the sex goddess will be useful for you.
Step # 1: Make it a hint that yesterday promises to be hot
Of course, you don’t have to say everything – there are things that need to be kept secret, but if he knows that something special is planned, the whole day will be eagerly awaited. The thought vibrates in his head all day – yesterday promises to be hot! Gives a few hints, but doesn’t go into all the details. Make sure the hints are unexpected and sexy: a tag with erotic content, a ugly picture or seductive lingerie in his briefcase. Don’t be afraid to experiment with these little surprises.
Step # 2: New environment – new emotions
You can have this sexy party in your home, but you’ve definitely done it hundreds of times, haven’t you? To make the evening especially erotic and sensual, you need a new environment , such as a rented room in a hotel. A new environment will give new emotions and a special spark that will make him (and you!) Lose his mind. Want to go even further? Do not go to the hotel together, but separately. It will make you feel like in a movie, and the evening will look even more erotic.
Step # 3: Take your time, but tempt
Yes, you have been together for a long time and you just want to drop your clothes and immediately throw yourself on top of each other. There is nothing wrong with that, but by making him wait, you will be a winner – the night will get a new level of passion. No matter what you do, don’t do it fast, tempting your loved one – make him struggle (in a good way, of course) until you are sure he can’t stand it anymore. And then make him wait a little longer… After all – you both have all night ahead, why hurry?
Step # 4: Play your favorite scene
Want to try role-playing games , but don’t know where to start? It can be confusing at first, so it’s best to choose a scene you know. This means that you will have to watch an obscene movie (maybe even two), choose your favorite scenes and play them together. Yes, this night will definitely be remembered!
Step # 5: Give him a sexy massage
A good massage is always a great idea. If you want to make things more passionate, try a body-to-body massage that will give the night a special sparkle. Be gentle, tease him whenever the opportunity arises, do not rush. When the evening gets especially hot, let him experience a happy ending – we will leave it to you!
Step # 6: Get to know a new toy – let him be in the lead
Sexy toys are a great way to sharpen bedroom adventures. It seems to you that the pleasant use of the vibrator will give pleasure only to you, however, if you let him be in the lead, he will be happy too. If you’re brave enough, buy a remote-controlled vibrator, place it where it should be, and go out of the house together. Just remember – the remote control must be in HIS hands…
Step # 7: Tie him up and do whatever else goes
Want to be in control? We have a plan! Why not tie him up and do whatever you want while he’s feeling good? Such games are definitely something that every couple should try. Buy fluffy handcuffs or a tie will suffice, tie his arms and legs, cover his eyes and let his imagination run wild. Just in case – agree on a word with which he will be able to stop the game – you never know how passionate a night can be.
Great dates, lots of laughter, a strong emotional connection, but something is wrong with the bed. In a survey conducted 5 years ago, half of the women surveyed said that bad sex meant the end of a relationship. 44% of men agreed that in this case, they do not see a future in the relationship. But does bad sex really mean a strong “no” in a relationship? Not at all! There are several ways to solve this problem.
Where is the problem ?
The reasons can be different. Maybe one partner has experienced more than the other, or one has fetishes that are not acceptable to the other. Sometimes we just assume that the current sex partner will enjoy the same sex as the previous one. It is also possible that one of the partners has sexual dysfunction or pain during intercourse. Unfortunately, sometimes we can be just sexually incompatible, and it’s not always possible to change that.
Conversation is important
Sex therapist Tiffanie L. Davis Henry emphasizes that if a partner fails to talk about their sexual needs as an adult, then the person should not sleep at all. When a potential long-term partner appears, we need to start talking about our sexual needs and priorities as early as possible. To make this conversation as positive as possible, turn it into a game that will not only get to know each other’s sexuality better but will also be a great time. 70 sex questions to ask your partner will undoubtedly be a good start to erotic conversations. Take a look here too – 30 spicy questions about and around sex to ask your husband.
Tips for conversation:
Don’t talk about bed problems in the bedroom. It is better to do it in a more neutral environment;
Do not start a conversation until the problem has subsided. Talk to your partner when there are more good things to say to him / her;
If possible, describe the problem positively: not “I really don’t like you doing…”, but “I really want you…”;
Talking about sex does not mean filling in a book of complaints. If you are planning to say something negative, emphasize how satisfied you are with making love to this person;
It is important that the conversation does not become an avalanche of criticism. If you have expressed the negative aspects of sex life, suggest what and how could be changed, or at least invite each other to look for solutions together.
If the problem is technique
If your partner doesn’t do what you like or doesn’t do the way you like, the conversation can be moved to the bedroom. Say what you want: “tap here”, “below”, “softer”, guide the partner with your hands, showing the movements. When the partner has done everything well, reward him with passionate moans and a thrilling “yes!”.
Teach each other patiently, because each body is like a mysterious map that takes time to explore.
If one needs more time than the other
It is not new to anyone that women need more time and effort than men to reach orgasm. If you face this problem – do not survive, because there are many solutions. It is better to choose a longer introduction so that the partner has enough time to warm up.
Stimulating the clitoris is the guarantor of women’s pleasure. So you can probably add a vibrator-like this to your sex toys to reach orgasm in a few moments.
If needs differ
Some may want sex every day, others once a month. And it’s nothing because we’re all just very different. There is a compromise so that you do not have to constantly give up on your needs. Give a partner who is more hungry for sex a toy that simply cannot be resisted.
Sex toys have become a great tool to give pleasure whenever you want. You can also play with yourself in front of your partner (if he/she agrees). It may stimulate the other’s libido and encourage him to participate.
When should I seek professional help?
If you’ve both talked and tried other ways, and your sex isn’t improving or even getting worse, it’s time to see a sex therapist who can help you solve your problems. Maybe the reasons will surprise you.
Does bad sex mean the end of a relationship?
It depends on the place of sex in your two lives. If sex is very important to both of you and everything fails no matter what you do, or maybe your partner doesn’t even want to talk about it, disappointment is guaranteed. According to medical urologist Tito Simashka: “Couples who are not sexually compatible have very little chance of staying together. Sexual compatibility is not only sex for both but also an opportunity to accept each other.
There is a classic massage that most people find relaxing, and then there is an erotic massage that can change lives. Erotic type massage is similar to the usual, except for the parts of the body on which it is aimed and that its purpose is to reduce tension and stress by increasing or achieving sexual arousal.
Many people would love to receive an erotic massage from their partner, provided it is done well. A poorly performed erotic massage can hurt – literally and figuratively. A partner once gave me a massage on the side of my abdomen, one of the few places where I have no muscles or tendons. However, when he started massaging the parts of my body that could relieve tension and increase arousal, he did not apply any pressure. There was a feeling that he was writing on my back, like on the keyboard.
You’re not that guy.
If you are doing an erotic massage, you should not do it “in half”. Erotic massage has two essential components, and you have to be good at both. The first is the actual part of the massage. This means no “writing on the back” and no “squeezing belly fat”. The second part – it must be done sensually.
Here are six steps you can take to become a master at both points.
1) Creating a mood
This should go without saying, but in any case, I will make it clear: You have to make your partner undress and lie face down on a firm bed. Install intimate lighting. Here you can use some dim lighting or some candles. Play relaxing music – it doesn’t have to be typical spa music or the sound of the rainforest, but it should be something the other finds soothing.
2) Use erotic oils and lotions
In this case, of course, you can use an ordinary body lotion. But ideally, we recommend buying massage oils or ones specifically designed to promote sexual pleasure. Or, if you prefer, try CBD massage oils.
3) Start (and continue) slow movements
For at least the first 20 minutes of an erotic massage, it should look just like any classic massage. You should definitely not go straight to the genitals. Initially, massage is a way to rest and relax, so until you start massaging/playing with your partner’s genitals, the other must be in a state of complete relaxation.
Uses the base of the wrist to make continuous flowing movements along the entire length of a particular muscle. Before moving on to the next one, make sure you devote enough time to the previous one (at least two minutes in each area). If you feel the tension in a place before moving to another part of the body, toss that place in it more thoroughly. (Tip: ask your partner if he/she has any particular pain in a particular area and pay more attention there).
4) After massaging each muscle, start focusing on the private parts
Now that your partner’s body has been massaged, it’s time to move on to the TO site massage. But it is important to have a full body massage beforehand. The back, neck, arms, wrists, fingers, feet, legs, everything must be massaged. Then (and only then!) You can resort to more fun places. And you have to start with “teasing” the intimate parts of the body. Approach to touch them without actually touching them. For example, instead of touching the nipples, massage around the chest. Instead of going straight to the vagina or penis, massage the area where the thigh joins the rest of the body.
5) Start massaging the genitals
After teasing long enough, only then touch the sexy parts. By this time, the partner should be fully aroused, so even a light touch will be enough to make him/her moan in ecstasy. Start with slow circular movements on the partner’s clitoris or start with light arm movements around his penis. After a while, you can do more, whether it’s sex or oral.
6) Allow the partner to finish
If you have done everything right, there is a high probability that your partner will reach orgasm. For God’s sake, don’t stop just before he/she finishes! Do your best to make sure the other one reaches orgasm.
What has the most impact on men in bed? Surprisingly (or maybe not so much because guys have a reputation for being lazy), most admit that they are not interested in a theater performance or acrobatic tricks. In fact, many men said they were simple creatures who basically just wanted their wives and girlfriends available. But if you are looking for something special to offer him, then take a look at this list and find out what men are quietly hoping to try in bed.
1. Do this with the lights on
You may worry about what the man thinks of your breasts after breastfeeding, your cesarean section, or that at some point you will no longer find him attractive because you look a little – well, a lot – differently than when you meet. But men rarely notice your own perceived shortcomings – they only find out about them if you are overwhelmed and exaggerated to talk about whether you try too much to hide it. “It’s true, men are very visual,” says relationship expert Bernardo Mendez. “But it’s really about wanting to see you move, preferably without clothes. We’re happy with how happy we can make you in bed, and that’s what we’re focused on – not how much you’ve changed. ” So let them see everything.
2. Touch yourself
For some women – and men – it may seem uncomfortable, but listen. “Watching a confident woman fully engage in her sexuality gives us tremendous arousal,” says Mendez. It’s like giving your partner a private ‘peek’ show. Being able to see the pleasure in a woman’s face and better understand exactly how to touch her is both an exciting experience and a valuable lesson.
3. Use your mouth
“We can never stress enough: we like to have oral pleasure,” says dating coach Todd Valentin. “And we love it when you start it yourself – so we don’t have to pray.” So keep surprising him, and not just because he has a birthday or you’ve lost a bet.
4. Be vocal
We don’t recommend scary, artificial porn stars moaning, but men want to know when you enjoy yourself. “It doesn’t mean you have to talk rude,” says Valentine. “Teams like” fuck me harder “can make us standstill. But telling us that you like something like, “I like that you do it so hard,” is much better. ” And if you allow yourself to linger like in the good old days, you will be amazed at how well he will react to it.
5. Focus on his sensitive areas
Particular attention should be paid to the tip of his penis. “Be careful, but know that with different tongue movements here and there, your partner will be left without words,” Valentin suggests.
6. Provides pleasure everywhere, just not in bed
“Men fantasize about sex in different places,” says Dr. Scott Halmans, author of The Secret of a Happy Married Man. While regular sex also has its place, he sometimes wants to do something else – and it’s good for you too. One day, go to Ikea, find a faux bear rug, and express yourself on the floor by your fireplace. Or just meet him on the couch while the kids are with friends.
7. Brake
We have all been in this situation: you are completely tired and trying to achieve this, or you are just so preoccupied with this process that your body automatically moves very fast. But slowing down can be surprisingly effective. “Men like to be able to feel everything and they have time to explore everything,” says Valentin. “For example, if you have oral sex, take the penis all the way in and out very slowly so that he only barely touches your mouth. Once you have finished teasing him, you can go at full speed, but the slow pace will be more enjoyable at first.
8. Show your acting
“Many married men worry that they will get tired of having sex with only one woman,” says Haltzman. That’s why role-playing games are so effective. In addition to being his fabulous wife, your husband might also like a sexy “barista” or “maid.” “Entering the fantasy mode automatically increases the levels of dopamine, an excitatory hormone, and increases your sense of attachment,” adds Haltzman. So, even after you have done it with a “cop” or a “pirate”, you will feel closer to each other because you have done something new together.
9. Never underestimate the foreplay
Of course, guys have a reputation for wanting to get it in seconds but don’t forget that a slow start can be just as hot. Whether it’s a sexy text message you send to incite her or a slow improvised striptease dance, try to get her excited from the start. Why rush to the main event when you can do something even hotter?
10. Let him dominate himself
Couples so often get into a sex routine – at the same night, in the same place, in the same position. While the partner may not be doing anything to change the routine, men want them to have the right to subject the partner and take full control of what is happening, says Haltzman. Pull out one of his ties, have him tie your arms, and let him take control. We suspect that you will not regret it.
11. Do something forbidden
Most of the men surveyed found that they were interested in trying or having anal sex. “The almost forbidden nature of this activity and the obedience it demands of you make it something that men really want to experience but don’t want to recommend for fear of offending you,” says Mendez. If you are going to experiment with anal sex and you think your partner might like it, just start a conversation.
12. Touches in unexpected places
Did you know that men, apart from the penis, have many places that can be erogenous? There are some obvious places, such as the upper body or the inner edges of the thighs, but don’t forget less sexy or common places, such as the buttocks or behind the knees.
13. Indulge in his imagination
Sometimes you just have to ask. Just as no woman is the same, no two men are the same – and neither is their imagination. Ask your partner what his main sexual desire is, and then indulge in just that. Whether he wants to see you in a certain kind of underwear or in his fantasies you dominate him, you can only find out by asking. Assuming you have a healthy, honest relationship, he will be happy to tell you.
14. Dress up
Never underestimate transparent underwear. “Everything that makes a woman feel good in her body and sexually confident is very sexy,” says sex and relationship therapist Megan Fleming. Nothing seems sexier to your partner than a confident woman. I can personally confirm this fact; my husband can’t resist this little (and I emphasize the ‘little’) red nightgown, in which I sometimes walk carelessly around the house. ” But it’s not just wearing underwear. It’s a tease, a sexy text message that you send him announcing that you’ve bought underwear, but he has to wait until evening. Take your time and take responsibility, because your husband wants it all.
15. Allow some prostate play
Prostate massage may be new to you, or you may not have both. Maybe he’s been too shy to ask to put his finger on his back. Maybe it’s time to show your boyfriend what he’s missed. “A large part of the penis is inside the body; it almost looks like a boomerang, ”explains Fleming. “Entering the ‘back door’ massages the inner nerve endings, and that can make you feel really good.” Start by inserting your finger at a time when you are both very excited. Soon enough, he will wonder why he has not experimented with prostate play before. “It’s definitely worth checking out these waters,” says Fleming.
16. Create a list of choices
It is easy for any couple to get into a sexual routine. “What you like about a relationship with you and your partner usually stays on the list, but everything you don’t like isn’t tried,” explains Fleming. “So make a list of yes/no/not now/ overtime, developing intimacy and security, and look at that list from time to time and evaluate, for example, try role-playing or anal sex now.” It’s that simple! Think of all the fun you will have in writing the list together.
17. Introduce a sex toy
Do you think that sex toys are only meant when you want to be alone? Think again – there are so many sex toys available for both of you. You could also have a sexy show for him and let him watch you use your new favorite vibrator.
18. Speaks obscenely
This is an opportunity to get creative. There are so many super-sexy things women can say to their husbands in bed. Because let’s be real: nothing is more attractive than being a woman who is open about her desires and what she likes.
These bad, strange, and sometimes even scientifically inaccurate sex tips reflect the norms of society and the most popular beliefs about sex at certain times in history. Some are even quite shocking. I must say that we can be happy that 2020 is!
1900: Do not sleep in the same bed with your partner
The 1902 Marriage Handbook, ” What a Young Wife Ought to Know,” suggested a way to keep a spark in your sex life — never, never sleep in the same bed with your partner. “It is a habit in many English homes that everyone has their own personal room, which to our freedom-loving nature may seem like a rather cold habit; but isn’t it better at times when simple self-control seems more difficult? True, the door between these two rooms should rarely be closed, but the fact that there are two rooms frees you from many temptations and eliminates the familiarity that creates satisfaction even in married life, ”the book says. Furthermore, women are advised to have sex only if the goal is pregnancy.
1910: Self-satisfaction is bad
In Walter Gallichan’s 1918 book, The Psychology of Marriage, one thing was certainly clear: touching it will only lead to illness, mental illness, and the destruction of society.
As a precaution, parents were advised to monitor their children’s sexual appetites, such as interfering and ruining their lives, to deter them from doing so.
“Parents should recognize that auto-eroticism is suitable for spontaneous expression in young children; that this is often an example of playmates and that such practices often begin between the ages of 14 and 15, at a time when the sexual system is beginning to mature and new desires are emerging. A young child can be protected with hygiene products and kind instructions about the important role of the genitals in the life plan. Health activities should provide a simple, nutritious, non-stimulating diet, rational clothing, washing these parts of the body, free exercise and encouragement to play outdoors, as well as cultivating exciting interests and habits, ”the book said.
1920s: Women may need surgery to stop masturbating
In 1922, William Joseph Robinson’s book ” Woman: Her Sex and Love Life ” focused on a more radical approach to masturbation: if parents catch a daughter by touching their clitoris, they should simply consider surgery. “All girls, big or small, who have a tendency to masturbate or simply touch their genitals, or who complain of itching, should have their clitoris checked and, if contact is found, it should be corrected with surgery. This can easily be done under local anesthesia. With frightening thoughts of a scalpel at her private body, it was time to stop the girls from complacency.
1930: Do not reject a woman, otherwise she will be confused
“Women were weaker than men. Women are easily affected, even if it harms them. They worry about being more beautiful and pleasant than they take care of their health and happiness. If she is rejected, she becomes truly savage. Her eyes glow with anger and almost squeeze out of their places. Not far from “complete madness.”
1940: Don’t talk to a man in bed – especially don’t talk naughty
Having a book called What Men Don’t Like About Women is pretty much guaranteed to contain an endless amount of useless advice. This book, written by Thomas D. Horton in 1945, states that men hate it when women are unable to keep their damn mouth in bed, and it is especially annoying when they use vulgar language.
“Women often shock men with their speeches in bed. They use words and expressions that are rarely used even in salons. Their speeches are also repulsive in other respects. They say, “Oh dear, I’ve been with a lot of men, so I know, and I want to tell you, you’re the best, really, dear.” your mouth and mind when you go to bed next to a man, ”says the book.
1950: If a wife does not fulfill her husband’s desire for sex, then cheating is acceptable
Reverend Alfred Henry Thirer, in his book Satisfaction and Happy Marriage, written in 1951, compares a lazy cook to a wife unwilling to have sex. Such wives obviously deserve to be cheated.
This is a good wife who is always ready to satisfy her husband’s appetite for food and sex: “She remembered his choice of meat and took care to cut the exact slice of meat.” decoration… and, entering the house, she greets her with a smile and a kind touch of love. “
A bad wife is described as follows: “He is constantly made to eat indigestible meals, cold and tasteless, improperly cooked, placed on a kitchen table, covered with a dirty tablecloth. She doesn’t have to wonder if her husband will call often from the office and announce that he will have to stay longer tonight. “
Understand? A finely served dinner is offering himself whenever he wants, but a cold sandwich is a woman’s unwillingness to have sex and a man’s excuses to cheat on his wife at the time.
1960: Petting breaks your parents’ hearts
In 1961, counselor Anna Landers wrote a book, Since You Ask Me, in which she shared some great – and some abnormally outdated – tips for sex. On the topic of “petting” she wrote:
“Petting can:
Make you feel guilty and ashamed;
Damage to your reputation;
It can make you lose your guy because he may think you are cheap;
Lead to pregnancy;
Break the hearts of your parents. ”
Here’s a way to make young girls feel guilty. The mere idea that a woman is responsible for letting her sexual desire and emotions flow is an outdated prejudice.
1970: It is important for a woman to tear her own virgin film early
Attitudes towards sex changed significantly in the 1970s, when many couples began to feel safer to enjoy giving and receiving sex, both in serious relationships and beyond. However, there were some ideas that continued to spread, which now seem completely irrational. In 1970, the booklet Our Bodies (Ourselves ) was published, in which the film of a woman’s virginity was still a controversial topic.
“It is very easy for a woman to stretch her hymen by inserting a finger into her vagina and periodically applying a little pressure to the side of the entrance.”
“Some women go to gynecologists and have them stretch their virginity.”
To be fair, there is a valuable point in the booklet about the virgin film: men who considered it important to “pick their partner’s flower” had no idea how incoherent this idea really was – and women were urged not to fall into this trap, to take care of their virginity films. However, it is sad to think of women for whom a simple flap of the skin caused such stress.
1980: Reject someone by making yourself completely unattractive
In the ’80s, women just had to sit down and wait for a man to call them. But in case you thought men had gotten more mature in a relationship, read how a guy says his friend made sure all the aggressive ladies got the message that he didn’t want them to block his phone line:
“One friend deftly rejects supporters, accidentally mentioning so much allergy and eccentricity that a poor caller will eventually feel relieved if rejected.”
In other words, “It’s not your fault, it’s me and my disgusting inability to withstand pollen. You really won’t miss anything, little one. “
1990: Sex robots destroy traditional marriage
In 1997, an article entitled “The Effects of Robotic Sex” appeared in Futurist magazine, and this raised real concerns: what will happen when sexy sex bots replace women in bed? “Marriage can be destroyed by sex robots. Husband chooses sex with a sex robot, estranging from his wife; the jealous wife destroys her sex robot’s competitors and sues the manufacturer. “
The message was clear: sex robots are a bad idea (assuming the vibrators are not related to the robots?). Fortunately, so far, sexbots have probably destroyed only a few marriages.
2000: Sharpen your feelings – literally
Susan Heyman’s The Everything Kama Sutra Book is full of sex gems, but one really stands out: “Sharpen your senses by sharpening your tongue like hell, sipping mint vodka or tea and giving it down for oral pleasure.”
“Alcohol has a sensational heating effect, and mint is an instant cooler,” writes Heiman.
While it is true that many men may be aroused by this, they need to know their audience. One man will probably get excited about it, but another will say, “What the hell did you just put on my dick and why?”
2010: If you need a lubricant, you’re lazy
In 2015, Maxim magazine asked MMA star, Ronda Rousey, about sex, and she said women never needed a lubricant.
“In general, a girl needs one minute. He has to prepare her. You will never need a lubricant in your life. If you need a lubricant, you’re lazy and don’t waste time. ”
Here are just a few times when you may need a lubricant (and no, you’re not so lazy): after giving birth, during breastfeeding, on certain days of the month, such as immediately after menstruation, and when you’re really tired, you still want sex, but you can’t give 10 minutes to the foreplay.
Outdoor sex is always a bit exciting. There is a risk of being caught, which undoubtedly increases the enthusiasm of some people – but it can end up not as intended or even fined/arrested, depending on where you do it.
Of course, there is also a relative level of comfort – for example, if you decide to do it in the woods, there is a chance to collide with sharps or accidentally turn, for example, on sharp grass. Or, if you have sex on the beach, the sand can get into the places where you least want it.
But on the other hand, outdoor sex can be fantastic if done right.
If you haven’t enjoyed it yet, draw inspiration (or take into account less good experiences) from these five experience stories.
From crazy sex in the park to using sex toys on a fishing trip – these people share the best and worst experiences of having sex outdoors.
Maya, 23
“When I was with my ex-boyfriend, we often went fishing – during the day and overnight.”
‘We did it in the bushes, waiting for the fish to catch.’
“It was great because we were able to take all our sex toys with us and no one will hear your vibrator drone in the fields?”
‘In the summer I used to walk with an anal plug. When you’re outside, the feeling is much worse. ‘
Bella, 30
“I went to a 21-year-old party and immediately met the guy and I knew I wanted to sleep with him.”
‘We chatted a bit and then decided to go outside. We couldn’t do it at home because there was a party and all the rooms were filled with people partying or sleeping. ‘
‘We had to cross the street and go to the local church garden (basically the cemetery) and try to have sex against the church wall, but having sex on my feet has always been a bit difficult for me, so we moved to the trampoline on the church playground and continued to have sex there.’
‘Eventually, we gave up and lay down on the cold, hard land of January 4 right in the church parking lot.’
‘It was absolutely strenuous outside, and none of us finished. It was a funny disappointment and a kind of scary weird experience. ‘
Stefan, 34
‘I had my first date in a quiet, dandelion-covered park in the heart of a city. During the date, I was asked about every detail of my life – until I was curled up, kneeling as a child, thinking about my existence and the morals of life. ‘
‘The date/interrogation lasted until dusk, then the conversation died and I was ready to go home.’
“But as I watched as I cleaned up our date, our eyes met – and she tossed on top of me.”
‘We had sex hiding among the trees, with a crowded football match to our right and a swan-filled lake surrounded by families and children to our left.’
‘It wasn’t long, but it was weirdly great – we had sex as if we hated each other. It was gorgeous, full of anger and rage. ‘
‘A week later, I sent her a text message saying that I didn’t believe we had compatibility in the dating application. She replied, saying she appreciated my text message. ‘
Daniel, 29
‘While I was in university, I lived with my parents, and so did my friend at the time.’
‘Unfortunately, this meant that we could not really have sex in bed because my family was quite religious and he had not yet told his family about his orientation. That’s why we chose sex in cars and parks. ‘
‘Once we drove to a local national park and found a trail that looked pretty closed. After careful verification, we started doing things. ‘
“We got so excited and forgot to look around that suddenly a guy appeared next to us walking with his dog.”
“We stopped quickly, and the man-made some horrible sound and walked away quickly.”
“We went back to our car and finished the sex, which was strangely even more exciting after the attachment.”
Patrick, 30
‘Before meeting my current girlfriend, I often slept with different women.’
‘One time I went for a night walk with a girlfriend who I used to sleep in, and we found ourselves having sex on the beach.’
‘It was one of those beaches with a high flood wall, and the shore was below. I remember we definitely heard people passing over our heads, so we had to be quiet (but luckily we couldn’t see us). ‘
‘All I remember is that the sound of the waves and the night sky made the whole process really breathtaking, with the added risk of being caught.’
‘Although it was quite uncomfortable. (It was a pebble beach.) ‘
Ambera, 22
‘It was a very early summer morning and it was so bright that it literally looked like the middle of the day.’
“We couldn’t go to me or his house, so we thought, ‘hell, let’s try to do it outside.’ ‘
‘I was too scared to do it near people’s houses, instead, we went under a pretty big bridge and tried to do it there.’
‘I put on my coat and lay on my back. We’re starting to do it, but he couldn’t stay solid for more than seven seconds because he was very nervous. ‘
‘Then we suddenly heard dog stunners and literally pulled up our pants and ran away.’
“After that, I didn’t talk to her for a while and we never had sex again.”
